Three weeks ago I made a commitment to blog once a week, beginning the following week. Two days later I awoke to find my nose was imitating a leaking tap, sadly the first signs of man flu.
Last week I found a draft that I had originally written 18 months ago, before the global pandemic, when I had thought it a good idea to blog again. With a sweep of editing, that became my first post.
This past week I’ve still been battling man flu, COVID tests and doctor’s appointments. Alongside of work and uni. Sadly, I do not have a blog post ready.
To top off my week, and ramblings of self pity, the state has gone into a lockdown. While we have done this time and time again, there is always a heavy cloud that falls on the city whenever this happens. A mixture of fear, anxiety and general apathy. Those who work in mental health inform me it’s a form of a trauma response.
“Be kind to yourself” says the small voice in my head.
I am reminded of the song by the same name, by singer song-writer Andrew Peterson. It is now on a loop in my head.
Like a water tank, we each only have so much capacity to give to the world. And like a water tank, we are limited by the current level in the tank. Sickness, work, covid lockdowns are all things that take from the water tank. This morning I would have gone out for breakfast with myself, as an act of filling the tank. Sadly, that cannot happen.
So today, this is all I have got, and I’m ok with that. My prayer is that when you next find yourself piled with thing after thing outside of your control, that you too remember this - Be kind to yourself.